An Exploration of Mindfulness Meditation Practice and its Role in Parenting

In her pre-conference entry, Jude Brown explained how learning to be ‘in the moment’ to connect with her children has led to current doctoral research aiming to capture this embodied lived experience and exploring how it may shape our relationships and connections with young children.

We have become more familiar with the ethos and practice of "In the moment planning" (Ephgrave, 2018), but do we need to consider adopting more 'in the moment practice and parenting?'

Young children are often already able to be present. When we relinquish any pre-set agenda of intended learning and instead provide them space by 'stepping back', young children engage in activities of their choosing freely and without any pre-determined agenda. The adult role is to follow and observe this 'spark' of play and curiosity and become immersed within it. Only intervening when there are, as Ephgrave calls it, opportunities for 'teachable moments'. We know that being open and tuned into children as they are engrossed in their play or follow their endeavours is crucial to support early development. Being available to respond quickly creates effective interactions and moments of shared learning. However, how do we, as adults, ensure that we are 'in the moment' ourselves and make the most of these precious opportunities? How can we ensure that we genuinely observe them and step into their present moment world? To learn from them, we must pay attention, be still within ourselves, and cultivate our awareness and openness to embody and sense these chances to connect. 

Twelve years ago, I decided to make a change in dealing with my own stress and anxiety, which led to a significant shift in how I parented. I had two young children, 5 and 6, and I spent most of my time judging myself and my parenting, trying to be a 'do it all' parent most of the time! Ruminating about past decisions and worrying about the future, I forgot to enjoy being a mum!

My own discovery of mindfulness led to a clear understanding of the present moment and its potential to transform our relationships. I was so used to 'doing' that I forgot to 'be' and realised I was missing out on the simple joy of observing my children and the critical moments of their development and learning. I began to take time out to sit watching my children engage in their play. I slowed down and focused using my sensory awareness, listening, seeing, feeling, noticing and connecting with my own breathing—all core skills of mindfulness practice.  

I felt like I became blessed with some knowledge that had always been there but, somehow, I was unaware of it. It was like 'unlocking a new door' to the parenting experience.  

My current doctoral research aims to capture this embodied lived experience and explore how it may shape our relationships and connections with young children. The theoretical framework draws on contemporary theories of mindfulness (Kabat-Zinn, 2013) and its phenomenological perspective (Brown & Corden, 2009), which includes the role of attention (Brown & Ryan, 2003), supported by concepts of attachment (Ainsworth, 1979) and reflective functioning (Fonagy et al., 2002).  

Theoretical correlations are emerging through the work of Rogers’ (1959) person-centred therapy and the core conditions of congruence, empathy and unconditional positive regard, and the literature of Jon and Myla Kabat-Zinn (1997) who presented three aspects, 'sovereignty, empathy, and acceptance', that can shape present-moment parenting. My research has also begun to examine evidence from slow pedagogy (Clark 2022), where we focus on valuing the present moment by paying attention to children's pace, rhythm and interests and encourage an 'unhurried' space to wallow, wonder, reflect and tune in. (Froebel Trust, 2023).

Mindful parenting is described as a fundamental parenting skill or practice (Steinberg, 2004; Kabat-Zinn & Kabat-Zinn, 1997). It could sustain conscious awareness, enhancing the capacity of parents or practitioners to 'mentalise' children's immediate experiences (Fonagy et al., 2002). This suggests that mindful parenting and practice can be healing and transformative for children and adults.  

In my pilot, participants practised brief moments of mindfulness during their day and recorded them through a culture probe toolkit (Gaver 1999). This may include journaling, using creative or visual media, drawing or taking photographs of instances that felt present or prominent when parenting. I have collected early data such as doodles, notes, selfies, and conversations. Capturing how participants recorded what they felt, saw or noticed when they became consciously aware of being 'in the moment' or recognised a change in how they responded to their young child.

My BECERA presentation will share these recent findings and early analysis in readiness for my primary fieldwork later this year, and provide an opportunity for early discourse on the potential impact of 'presence' when parenting or working with young children. 

Jude Brown is a part-time Doctoral student with Centre for Research in Early Childhood (CREC) and The University of Wolverhampton. She currently teaches part-time at CU Coventry on the undergraduate Early Years Degree and is also a qualified MBSR Practitioner and Connected Kids Professional Tutor. 

References: 

Ainsworth, M., 1979. Infant–mother attachment. American Psychologist, 34(10), pp.932-937. 

Brown, K. and Cordon, S., 2009. Toward a Phenomenology of Mindfulness: Subjective Experience and Emotional Correlates. Clinical Handbook of Mindfulness, pp.59-81. 

Brown, K. and Ryan, R., 2003. The benefits of being present: Mindfulness and its role in psychological well-being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(4), pp.822-848. 

Clark, A. (2022). Slow Knowledge and the Unhurried Child: Time for Slow Pedagogies in Early Childhood Education (1st ed.). Routledge. https://doi.org/10.4324/9781003051626

Ephgrave, A. (2018) Planning in the Moment with Young Children: A Practical Guide for Early Years Practitioners and Parents, Oxon, Routledge.

Fonagy, P., Gergely, G., & Jurist, E.L. (Eds.). 2002. Affect Regulation, Mentalization and the Development of the Self (1st ed.). Routledge.  

Froebel Trust. Available at: https://www.froebel.org.uk/ (Accessed: February 10, 2023).

Gaver, B., Dunne, T. and Pacenti, E., 1999. Design: Cultural probes. interactions, 6(1), pp.21-29.

Kabat-Zinn, J., 2013. Full catastrophe living. New York: Bantam Books.

Kabat-Zinn, M. & Kabat-Zinn, J. 1997. Everyday Blessings: The Inner Work of Mindful Parenting. New York: Hyperion. 

Kabat-Zinn, J., 2003. Mindfulness-based interventions in context: Past, present, and future. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice, 10(2), pp.144-156. 

Manuello, J., Vercelli, U., Nani, A., Costa, T. and Cauda, F., 2016. Mindfulness meditation and consciousness: An integrative neuroscientific perspective. Consciousness and Cognition, 40, pp.67-78. 

Rogers, C. (1959). A Theory of Therapy, Personality and Interpersonal Relationships as Developed in the Client-centered Framework. In (ed.) S. Koch,Psychology: A Study of a Science. Vol. 3: Formulations of the Person and the Social Context. New York: McGraw Hill.

Steinberg, L. 2004. The 10 basic principles of good parenting. New York: Simon & Schuster.